Comedian.Actor.Writer

Posts tagged “updates

This week in Calgary

I have been in Calgary now for 3 days and I have found out the secret to success, its time travel. I have decided that I am going to spend 1 month in Toronto set up all the work I have to do and than start traveling back in time. Calgary is 2 hours behind so that is an extra 2 hours of work, if I go back another 2 hours that 4 extra hours of work etc. I believe that if I tap into this properly I am on to something huge.

Also In the mall I saw a lady projectile vomit which was gross, a baby was staring at me and walked into a chair, and got into a fight with a waitress cause this was trying to tell me a sandwich nick name is “sammy” . All in all its been a good time, shows have been amazing thanks to Derek Sweet and James Moore both sold out shows. Tonight I am at Jupiter Lounge and Chris Gordons show. Thurs-Sat I am at Laugh Shop –

Next week in Toronto I am pumped to be part of The Most Races show on Earth April 14th Markam Theatre

Make sure you check out for updates to the Twitter Gong Show which is April 17th – cause we will be reviling the New web series “#HASHTAG” also the Twitter Gong Show official website that has all the update’s and you will be able to watch the show there, as well as video’s web series and a lot more…

Stay tuned for more updates and stupid thoughts, before I leave here is a line from a movie that i made up in my head:

OPen on a small town with old mentallty and the “town bully” is a 6 ft male with an attitude problem. Claude moves into the town and the “bully has a issue with this”

Claude is waiting in line and the bully Leonard cuts in front of him

          CLAUDE

hey man I am sorry you just cut in front of me in this line

Leonard

you must not know who I am.

CLAUDE

you must be the town genius

everyone in the place starts “wooing”

END

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Mark’s Bully

So first things first, I beat up Mark. This is his bully Titus Galloway, and I’ve got some things to say.

As a professional bully and part time employee at The Gap, I have noticed that babies think that they are cooler than they actually are, like when I started and was getting 4 hrs a week, they put me in the baby gap (sounds gross I know) section and I see these babies rolling in on there stroller with a lean on, and I’m like baby please, do you know what I can do to you, and they are all like “oh I need these bell bottom jeans” and I am like baby what do you need bell bottom jeans for? and they are like none of your beeswax.

Well Mark is coming to so I have to go beat him up again, also he said something about he updated his website and there are new shows and info somewhere.

TITUS


First Blog Of 12.

First of all what is a blog, its the year 12 and I have no idea what I am doing I came across this computer and a comedian named Mark DeBonis left some words on paper, here is what it said:

Dear World,

How have you been? I have been alright, just got passed the holidays and it was good for family and all but bad for comedy- There was no shows for a long time, and the ones I did were nothing to write home about. I understand the irony of this cause I am writing. The Twitter Gong show #3, was a mini success again, but more for the “behind the scenes” stuff a lot of kinks were taken care off, and January will be packed with shows, it started with a week long trip to New York City which was awesome and followed with opening for Tom Green and headlining all at the same time… I have left a list of dates for comedy shows I will be doing and will try to write to you more oftten Mark from the past,

I love you,

Mark “from the future” DeBonis


2 posts 1 month!!– New show ” Twitter Gong Show”

Hey guys I know how crazy this is but i am just letting you know that i am starting a new show, its a TWITTER GONG SHOW, its pretty straight forward- The act is on stage and there is a live twitter feed to decide when they get gonged- I will be hosting and there will be 3 Judges Matt O’Brien- Garrett Jamison– Rob Bebenek. There will be more updates soon but for now follow us on twitter at Twitter Gong show  so you can be apart of the gonging– if interested in being on our first show email us at twittergongshow@gmail.com— more info at Twitter Gong show Kind of Official Page. Thanks Mark

 

 


My once a month blog are you pumped..

Hey so i realized i only do this once a month, only when i update my shows so ya there is not much i gotta say just this week I will be on XM radio with Ben Miner, check that out AND the Laugh Off will air Saturday I believe, not sure what time sorry. So check out the show listing and also click this link to more details about shows that I will be producing this month

http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=227150610639325

thanks cowboys and aliwomen


People may actually read this(but probably not)

Hey everyone whats going on, I have realized that i suck at blogging and probably will never be good at it, but that does not bother me i will have to find a new way to keep in touch with who ever comes across this site mostly by accident. My Blogs are either too long or dont make sense so until i find a new form of talking to you i am just gonna let you know about a couple media things i will be apart of for the next couple week-

June 3rd i will be on Daytime Toronto on Rogers TV airing at 10am-3pm-12am

June 9-20th I will have an ad in the Now Magazine promoting my website, shows and MDB services

June 30th-July 7th I will be on XM Radio with Ben Miner

More Details to come with all and until i find a better way I will just talk to you in person like humans used too do.


GREAT CANADIAN LAUGH OFF 2011/DVD UPDATE

Hey so this year i won the Yuk Yuks Great Canadian Laugh Off. It was held at yuk Yuks Downtown Toronto or also known as the “SuperClub”. The whole experience was something i have never been apart of before. I was really happy just too make it too the finals, cause the comics that were there are all amazing. The thing i hate the most about the whole process is that we have to stay in the venue all day until show time, its like starring the beast in the eyes, but not in a way where you can show confidence by facing the music and over coming but in a way where the best is watching you from home on a tv screen, but really its not even there its out doing whatever a beast would do all day until the times comes that they have to go to a comedy show that night. What i am trying too say is the beast is the crowd, not the venue. Either than all the waiting and the new saying I heard 1000 times “Hurry up and wait” i have no complaints the whole show from start too finish as awesome, and my set was nothing i would be ashamed off. When ever i write i joke i have points where i would like too get laughs and most of the time those points are not hit, but sunday i am confident too say that every point i wanted to hit got hit.

As you may or may not be able too see i really dont look too happy in that pic, and too be honest with you i dont know what i am in that pic. All i know is, I was using all my brain power not too pass out, cause it almost happened. After the show there were lights, and cameras everywhere and people talking and waiting and just having a good time. I was happy too meet all the judges which hopefully one day will remember me and keep the momentum going in my career. Anyways i am still trying too figure out this whole blog system and how to get a good blog going so for the 3 people that read this thanks and for all the others i will see you in real life.

Also I would like too add that the poster is done for the DVD and we are now in motion with promo and setting everything up all we can do now is see you June 4th at The Hardluck Bar in Toronto 812 Dundas street


UPDATES–GONNA BE BUSY

Pod cast will be recorded Monday.april.11th

DVD is booked for June. 4th

DVD Tour May 25th-28th

Web Series in Production

Stand UP clips To Be uploaded..


Once upon a time, when my jokes were thoughts #1- The Gym

So after about 4 years I had to go back to the gym cause I told myself if i ever weighted more than 230, I would have to get back in shape. So 2 years of being 240 and a girlfriend in the picture, I

finally went back. I am not gonna lie I really dont know if I am a fan of the gym anymore, the people in there are people I really cant stand or just dont understand. My size adds to the expectation

that people have for me when I walk in, its a constant competition in there, who can lift the most weights, the fastest and loudest. I have realized that I have no interest in becoming a body builder

a long time ago so I have no interest in having biceps, so curling 60+ pounds is really doing nothing but giving me a head ache. And at this gym I am at they have a sign up board for the cardio

equipment, which to me makes no sense, cause if i walk in and there is no one on the machine I am pretty much gonna just use it, I dont need some person who decides to grow a pair of balls to tell

me too get off “their” machine cause they put there name in marker on a white board an hour ago, and I am ruining there routine by being there at that point of time. And than you have the people

who just have way too much time on their hands, or just enjoying showing off that that are well off and have nothing else to do, cause I was at the gym and me and this guy walk in at the same

time and I go straight to the machine and he does straight to the mats and starts stretching (which i am aware its something that should be done and i have maybe never done it before) I continue

my exercise and do everything i planned on doing, I like to finish with a little cardio so i go back in to use the machines and this guy is still stretching. I could not believe it, I mean who has an

hour and a half to just stretch, you know. Like I am a person with little to nothing to do on a daily basis but that is a joke, unless this guy’s sole purpose of the gym this day was just too stretch,

than at that point he is just showing off his stretching abilities cause he could of just stayed at home, but in that scenario the people at the gym could not go home wishing there were as flexible as

this hipster pretzel. It was at this point I wish I was the type of person who was able to just motivate himself in any area, cause I realized how much I hated going to the gym and wished I was able

to work out at home, or just kick the guy in the back and getting credit for it not a record. So now I realize the importance of an ipod in the gym and the ability to have tunnel vision, cause in the end

the guy who see me staring at him in the gym does not think that its a stare of me wanting to kick him, those days are over. Now it seems that its a stare of me wanting to ask his name.

 


Getting updated

Hey people random things i do page has new content in it, and videos. also new email address plus power lunch with debonis.

let me know what you think and spread the word